Dalia Gamez
December 8, 2009
Final Essay
Puente
Susie Huerta
My Grown up World
What I did and did not have
As a little kid I dreamed about being the princess in the fairytale books. Being a famous Artist where I get to sing and dance and express myself. All eyes on me. I would say that I had a “different” childhood. My mom was my eyes, I lived and breathed through her. I love her touch her kisses her caress, she worked all the time so I didn’t get much of her. When I had her around all I wanted to do is be with her. My mom was never the type who told me how to act or what to be in school. I never had that fear of “my mom’s going to kill me if I don’t get a good grade.” My motivation was always up to me. She wasn’t really involved in my schoolwork or in my activities. It’s not that she didn’t care about what I was doing but she taught me that my motivation should be genuinely moved by just me. She always educated me at a young age that whatever I want out of this life I have to do it on my own, because no one will want it the way that I will. If dancing was really my passion I would decide to stay in an after school program, my support and motivation was me. I ask myself why I didn’t end up becoming lazy or unmotivated to do anything without the fear of mother. It’s odd to me as a young adult…
“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts”
-Winston Churchill
It really changed my view when I started high school. By then, my older sister had graduated and decided not to go to college. Like I said earlier, I was my own support because everyone in the house pretty much did their own thing. No one was really inspiring me or pushing me to pursue something. Again it was my choice, always. I decided that I wanted to earn some money so I wanted to start working at the age of fourteen. I begged my mother to please let me work because I was bored at home. She finally accepted my proposal and I started working part time. Then I really wanted to try out for my high school dance team and I made it in. I would come home around seven and see my older sister at home. She was either watching television, talking on the phone, napping, or eating. I would come home really tired from practice and with a ton of homework. Sometimes I would be mad at the fact that I had so much to do and my sister had it so “easy.” Day after day senior year I’d see that repetition, that life that my sister was living and I didn’t like it. What a boring life… I live on the go and she was moving slower than a snail. I thought to myself I don’t want to become that person, I don’t want life to be that easy, I need a challenge. My mom had a decent job where she got paid well and didn’t need to slave herself to hard work. She did on the other hand spent a lot of hours at her job, but it wasn’t dreadful. My mother worked herself up from nothing to having everything that she wanted now and that’s the best lesson my mom could have taught me without words. Having two different kinds of role models shaped me into the young lady that I am today. With my mother working so hard to be the best that she can and my older sister having life so “easy” I had the best of both worlds. Now I just have to create mine.
Inequality
As I get older I start to see the world in different eyes. That saying that people always say, is actually true…. “Life’s not fair.” I started thinking about that when my best friend first got her license and started driving to school. Before that we used to take the bus every morning. Having extra sleeping time was the best; a car is so much handier. In the street I would see my raza, men as old as my dad’s age riding the bike in the morning, most likely to get to work. Here I am in a warm comfortable car getting to places quicker than my raza; men or women who need it more than my friend or I do. When I go on vacations and stay at hotels I see women and men as old as my grandparents cleaning dirty rooms to get paid minimum wage. Here I am in a job where I sit in a call center and answer phones. I do work hard but not nearly as much physical work as other people do. I think to myself I can’t let unfairness catch me. I have to work hard so that I don’t let those hands grasp me and pull me back so that I stay behind. The world of unfairness can’t catch me if I don’t let it. I hope that when I get older I don’t have to regret anything in my life that I didn’t get to do. Not taking advantage of all the opportunities were given, sometimes once in our life is very unfair to me. Our society also works in many unfair ways. Since anyone can remember men are viewed superior than a women. Even today in surveys and statistics men get paid on average higher than women do. It’s so unfair how women have to fight in order to be “equal to men” and men don’t worry about defending themselves at all. Our society is so fixed on one perspective in life that it’s hard to go out of that “traditional bubble.” Men are the providers and the women are the housewives.
“If you had a husband, I would give him your money but since you haven’t got a husband I can’t give you any more money that I’ve already given you.”
-Victor Villasenor
It’s hard to defend ourselves as women but sometimes we do have the advantage in other aspects. We’ve learned how to fight it with our master minds. That’s what keeps us going, that’s what makes us stronger.
Only one life
No one knows what will be the last day that we live on this earth. I want to live life to the fullest. I want the best life possible for myself. I believe in people “getting lucky” in life but I can’t just rely on that. I know education will provide that for me and lead me to where I’m supposed to do during my existence. My purpose here on this earth. Going to college opens up so many doors for me. New people to meet, new subjects to learn about. It’s a whole new life and world to experience out there. I think to myself what would I be doing if I weren’t in school? Working a full time job? Going out all the time with my friends? To gain what at the end? Being in school doesn’t only open new horizons for me but it also keeps me busy and motivated to know that I’m working towards a goal. I know I might be missing out on some experiences now, but I know that if I sacrifice at least six or seven years of my life, I will be successful in the future and I’ll enjoy what I have made on my own. I’m very curious about my future. I know I’ll make mistakes along the way and I’m not perfect so I won’t do everything just right, but it’s better to have done and failed than never have tried.
“Learn from yesterday, live for today, and hope for tomorrow”
-Unknown
We humans have the power to choose our paths, struggles, and how happy we want to be or become. My time starts now, and I’m ready. Bring it on world.
