Final Essay/ My Grown up World

Dalia Gamez
December 8, 2009
Final Essay
Puente
Susie Huerta




My Grown up World



What I did and did not have
As a little kid I dreamed about being the princess in the fairytale books. Being a famous Artist where I get to sing and dance and express myself. All eyes on me. I would say that I had a “different” childhood. My mom was my eyes, I lived and breathed through her. I love her touch her kisses her caress, she worked all the time so I didn’t get much of her. When I had her around all I wanted to do is be with her. My mom was never the type who told me how to act or what to be in school. I never had that fear of “my mom’s going to kill me if I don’t get a good grade.” My motivation was always up to me. She wasn’t really involved in my schoolwork or in my activities. It’s not that she didn’t care about what I was doing but she taught me that my motivation should be genuinely moved by just me. She always educated me at a young age that whatever I want out of this life I have to do it on my own, because no one will want it the way that I will. If dancing was really my passion I would decide to stay in an after school program, my support and motivation was me. I ask myself why I didn’t end up becoming lazy or unmotivated to do anything without the fear of mother. It’s odd to me as a young adult…
“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts”
-Winston Churchill
It really changed my view when I started high school. By then, my older sister had graduated and decided not to go to college. Like I said earlier, I was my own support because everyone in the house pretty much did their own thing. No one was really inspiring me or pushing me to pursue something. Again it was my choice, always. I decided that I wanted to earn some money so I wanted to start working at the age of fourteen. I begged my mother to please let me work because I was bored at home. She finally accepted my proposal and I started working part time. Then I really wanted to try out for my high school dance team and I made it in. I would come home around seven and see my older sister at home. She was either watching television, talking on the phone, napping, or eating. I would come home really tired from practice and with a ton of homework. Sometimes I would be mad at the fact that I had so much to do and my sister had it so “easy.” Day after day senior year I’d see that repetition, that life that my sister was living and I didn’t like it. What a boring life… I live on the go and she was moving slower than a snail. I thought to myself I don’t want to become that person, I don’t want life to be that easy, I need a challenge. My mom had a decent job where she got paid well and didn’t need to slave herself to hard work. She did on the other hand spent a lot of hours at her job, but it wasn’t dreadful. My mother worked herself up from nothing to having everything that she wanted now and that’s the best lesson my mom could have taught me without words. Having two different kinds of role models shaped me into the young lady that I am today. With my mother working so hard to be the best that she can and my older sister having life so “easy” I had the best of both worlds. Now I just have to create mine.
Inequality
As I get older I start to see the world in different eyes. That saying that people always say, is actually true…. “Life’s not fair.” I started thinking about that when my best friend first got her license and started driving to school. Before that we used to take the bus every morning. Having extra sleeping time was the best; a car is so much handier. In the street I would see my raza, men as old as my dad’s age riding the bike in the morning, most likely to get to work. Here I am in a warm comfortable car getting to places quicker than my raza; men or women who need it more than my friend or I do. When I go on vacations and stay at hotels I see women and men as old as my grandparents cleaning dirty rooms to get paid minimum wage. Here I am in a job where I sit in a call center and answer phones. I do work hard but not nearly as much physical work as other people do. I think to myself I can’t let unfairness catch me. I have to work hard so that I don’t let those hands grasp me and pull me back so that I stay behind. The world of unfairness can’t catch me if I don’t let it. I hope that when I get older I don’t have to regret anything in my life that I didn’t get to do. Not taking advantage of all the opportunities were given, sometimes once in our life is very unfair to me. Our society also works in many unfair ways. Since anyone can remember men are viewed superior than a women. Even today in surveys and statistics men get paid on average higher than women do. It’s so unfair how women have to fight in order to be “equal to men” and men don’t worry about defending themselves at all. Our society is so fixed on one perspective in life that it’s hard to go out of that “traditional bubble.” Men are the providers and the women are the housewives.
“If you had a husband, I would give him your money but since you haven’t got a husband I can’t give you any more money that I’ve already given you.”
-Victor Villasenor
It’s hard to defend ourselves as women but sometimes we do have the advantage in other aspects. We’ve learned how to fight it with our master minds. That’s what keeps us going, that’s what makes us stronger.
Only one life
No one knows what will be the last day that we live on this earth. I want to live life to the fullest. I want the best life possible for myself. I believe in people “getting lucky” in life but I can’t just rely on that. I know education will provide that for me and lead me to where I’m supposed to do during my existence. My purpose here on this earth. Going to college opens up so many doors for me. New people to meet, new subjects to learn about. It’s a whole new life and world to experience out there. I think to myself what would I be doing if I weren’t in school? Working a full time job? Going out all the time with my friends? To gain what at the end? Being in school doesn’t only open new horizons for me but it also keeps me busy and motivated to know that I’m working towards a goal. I know I might be missing out on some experiences now, but I know that if I sacrifice at least six or seven years of my life, I will be successful in the future and I’ll enjoy what I have made on my own. I’m very curious about my future. I know I’ll make mistakes along the way and I’m not perfect so I won’t do everything just right, but it’s better to have done and failed than never have tried.
“Learn from yesterday, live for today, and hope for tomorrow”
-Unknown
We humans have the power to choose our paths, struggles, and how happy we want to be or become. My time starts now, and I’m ready. Bring it on world.

Rain of Gold Last Summary/ Turned it in on time reminding you Susie

Dona Margarita was desperate to find her son Domingo and she was positive she was going to find him. She wrote multiple letters to him daily and to the whole neighborhood because she figured that someone had to know Domingo and the word would eventually get out. She went to church to demand to the Virgin Mary that she should do her part and talk to God and Jesus to get Domingo back safe to her. While talking to The Virgin she also meets a new priest whose name is Ryan and thinks that she’s weird. Switching it to Lupe, her sisters and herself are in the fields digging out dry apricots and its really hot and tough working sun up to sun down. She gets really sick because her body can’t take the hard labor and Carlota thinks it’s all an act. While hallucinating she thought of Salvador and his dream of getting rich and she liked it. After a few days she gets better and goes back to work, Salvador shows up with flowers and wants to take her for a drive on the moon in the fields. She was a little surprised but excited so she starts driving all over the place. When they go back to the house Isabel asked if they were going to get married and Lupe was really embarrassed. Salvador stayed for dinner and when he went to the car to leave they had their first kiss and they both loved it. He is really happy and goes home to tell his mom all about his day with Lupe. Dona Margarita say’s he has to act quick and her hook her before it’s too late. The rumors started piling up, saying that Salvador was a bootlegger. Salvador was really excited and started looking for wedding rings he thought of going to a whorehouse and seeing if those girls had any pretty rings he could buy for Lupe. He was so happy that he ended up sleeping with them. Dona Margarita talks to her husband’s enemy to get information about Domingo because that’s what Virgin Mary advised her. She made Don Ernesto get cool with her and that led her to finding Domingo. Domingo returns home with his new girlfriend Nellie and she’s pregnant. At dinner they finally start talking about why Domingo left and what happened of their father and Salvador gets into an argument with Domingo and he hit him. They both resent each other very much. Mark goes and visits Lupe upset and asking her what happened after being so close to him proposing. Lupe tells him it’s another guy and he gets really upset. Salvador asks Lupe hand in marriage with the priest the family finally says yes and Dona Guadalupe gives Salvador a white flower from back en La Lluvia to take care and nurture just as he would with Lupe. Some cop that doesn’t like Mexicans found out about the bootlegging Domingo and Juan had been doing, they destroy the business and beat them. Don Victor finds out Salvador is a bootlegger but he doesn’t cared because he heard he is a macho de Corazon. They get everything ready and they get married. They are very happy and made for one another.

Three Questions:

1. What is the risk of going against family traditions?

2. What can Salvador do to help make leaders of his people?

3. What is the price to pay for being a women?

Critical Thinking, News item

Recently a week ago I was sitting down eating breakfast when a breaking story came on t.v. A high school girl had gone to her homecoming dance and that night changed her life forever. Apparently she was in her dance and her friend suggested they would go outside and hang out with some guys. They started drinking and ended up getting really drunk. They said in the news that she was raped by about ten teenagers while she was unconscious. While the girl was being raped (identity withheld) the other men where taking pictures and recording video of the whole incident. The cops arrived too late and she was put in the hospital in emergency. She is stable but she was furiously beat and raped by several men. At the time she might have that it was cool to go outside and start drinking with a bunch of boys. The reality was that its dangerous to drink period and more so with a crowd of ten men who will most likely not take care of a young girl intoxicated. I'm sure the girl had no idea that leaving her dance and drinking would create this amount of chaos in her life. The sad reality though is that young teens are at risk of many things and we should never put ourselves in a dangerous position.

Self Evaluation

I wasn't very satisfied with the grade that I recieved. I feel that I work hard in everything that I do so I expect to get a good grade. I do know that I need more help in my writting, and thats probably what got me the grade that I recieved.From the responses that I recieved I feel that I paraphrase well but I don't organize my thoughts well in the summary. I still have the problem of writting the way that I speak and I need to change that. For the next assignment I'm going to meet with Susie so that she explains in greater depth the areas that I'm having trouble in. I want her to help me and break down my writting. The comments were really good and and I see where I'm messing up.

Most Valuable Technique Ch. 8

Chapter eight talks about the three different R's that can help a student retain information. I think if we apply those three R's to our studying habits, no matter what the subject is in school, it can help a lot. A method that helps me a lot to remember information I'm learning would be talking about it with another person or relating it to myself. Talking about it with another person helps me retain information better because I put it in a format of a conversation or little story. Words I might say later remind me of what the conversation was all about. When I relate information to me, its easier to keep it in my brain because its natural for me to remember because it has to do with me. Everyone is interested in themselves one way or another so its easy to remember. I also have a tendency of cramming a lot of information into one day because I have "homework days" where I get all my work done. In those days I get a lot done so its only natural for me to cram a lot of information at once. That's is a tendency I have to try and stop, and hopefully find another method that is more helpful and convenient for my learning.

Discussing Main Point and Meaning Blog

1. The survey that Libby conducted with college students didn't necessarily reveal that the word "Feminist" was a dirty bad word, but it did reveal that most people had a negative outlook on the word. Others didn't really care about the subject or the meaning. I know this because in her essay she tells us what the results of her survey came up as.

2. Libby says that most people don't identify themselves as feminists because "feminists" are viewed as "man haters" in most movies and the media. That definitely is viewed as negative to a lot of the public.

3. Libby thinks most people should identify themselves as feminists because feminists means simply the right to a choice, for both men and women.

Puente Conference

My thoughts weren't all that exciting going to the Puente Conference this Saturday. When we finally went inside the room and I saw so many Puente classes and everyone seemed to have a lot of energy and pride in their school. I started getting pumped up as well as all my friends did. We had a good breakfast and I enjoyed meeting new people and recieving tips on college information thats very valuable right now. I would say that the workshops were also informative and the people were really nice. During the tour we got familiar with the campus in general. I learned that psychology was one of the top majors in Sacramento State, it was really interesting to me considering that I want to major n psychology. Everyone was really nice and accomadating. I also felt that during this field trip I bonded way more with my Puente class. I talked to more of my classmates and we all shared the same experience that afternoon. I wish we could of stayed for the performances but I did understand that it would of cost a lot more to stay an extra hour. I was just happy with the simple fact that we all got to bond more, even though we all had to show up so early. Videotaping the afternoon too was very smart of you Voltaire because those are the memories we can see and share later. Thank you Voltaire and Susie for taking us to the conference I had a lot of fun and I hope we do a lot more trips like these so that we bond a lot more.

Anzaldua Blog Response #2

Anzaldua's article is very different from any other essay I've read because She makes one point but pretty much goes off into other points and examples as if she was in a conversation. She makes one point that leads to another and another and then some more; that's why it doesn't make the essay seem traditional or formal. This essay is academic because she she states what she is saying very clearly and she uses really good examples of her personal life and how she grew up. On the other hand it seems anti academic because she wrote her essay very differently. Its very "flowy" rather than "standard this and this" her examples are a little over everywhere so it makes the essay seem messy. I think Anzaldua writes this way because just like most Latinas we like to make everything interesting and add flavor to whatever were doing. She could of wrote it the persuasive way just like any other essay but that's not how she grew up. I think she wanted to evoke her roots and language and style to this essay and make it hers not correct English. I also think that shes trying to accomplish letting the reader see who she is and where she comes from, and if the reader is Latino then he/she can clearly relate to what shes talking about. "So, if you want to really hurt me, talk badly about my language" throughout her text she speaks about language and how much it means to her, so what i think her essay really comes down to is that nothing will hurt her more than some one talking about her language. Language is who she is.

Anzaldua Blog Response

Dear Anzaldua,

After reading "How to Tame a Wild Tongue" I realized that a lot of the Chicana, Latina, and Mexican language is very different from each other. There is this little secret competition just to see who's more of what. I see it all over the school but its one of those things where people know it but wont say anything official of it. The slang that you added in this article also brought a lot of memories of me growing up. I started to smile and even laugh when you mentioned that Spanish speakers often leave out certain consonants when they appear between vowels.The worst word for me would definitely be "puchando" I'm not sure where I even developed that word but I used to say it as if that was the correct word to tell someone to stop pushing me. Until one day my friend corrected me and said its "empujando" not puchando; I was a bit embarrassed. Another word that I grew up hearing and saying was "tennis" for my shoes. My mother would always say "alsa tus tennis" to us, most Mexicans think of shoes, but that's just a lingo that Mexicans invented. Its not the actual word for shoes; zapatos. My shoes weren't tennis shoes so I don't know how that word came about. Another famous one I can think of is "chocomil" for hot chocolate. My family says that, but when you really think about it whats chocomil? This article took me back to memory lane when I spoke different Spanish growing back. It took me back to my roots and my family. Thank you Anzaldua for writing an article that relates to so many of us.

VARK Activity

For the VARK Activity I chose to do the Aural Activity. I wanted to interview my best friend Danielle because she's a very hardworking student and I want to learn some of her techniques to be a better student as well. I interviewed her over the phone and she gave some of her some of her favorite techniques. First of all she told me that her agenda as well as her cell phone is her life. Her agenda lets her know everything that she must do in one day. She also prioritises on stuff that must get done first. She manages her homework by seeing how much time something will take or at least give a good estimation on how much time she needs for an assignment to get done. If she has a midterm she studies most of the night and then drinks lots of Coffey to help her stay up till later. she takes pride in the work that she does so she does the best that she can. She's anal and a perfectionists which forces her to get anything done no matter what circumstances she's in. Danielle is not proud of being a perfectionist but she says that pushes her more and motivates her to do her work. She eats well and maintain a physically active throughout the day so that her lifestyle doesn't become boring. She gets involved in school activities so that her life is balanced. When the homework load gets to be alto she take breaks in between to refresh herself and her brain. All these suggestions are really good advice that I plan to follow.

Literature Circle Blog Response #3

Question: What would people be willing to sacrifice in times of hardship?
When people are struggling a human being is capable of doing anything it takes to survive. People may sacrifice something that they dearly love or even sacrifice one's respect or pride, and that is way deeper and emotional than sacrificing something materialistic. In the book Rain of Gold we met a young boy named Juan, who left his mother and family at a very young age so that he would take the blame for a fight he was never involved in. In return, his family would receive a lot of money so that they would never have to starve or struggle. He sacrificed his own freedom for the good and wealth of his family. After many years and being a bit more of a man, Juan reunited with his family and found that his sacrifice was not worth everything he went through. With his family still struggling he had to do something, once again, to provide for the family. Gambling and playing cards was the easiest and fastest way to make money in California. Even though he was young he sacrificed being a bit scared and timid and played the dangerous world of gambling like a man should for his family. "He was just ranking in his money, feeling good and indestructible, when the Filipino got up to leave, saying that he had to go to the bathroom." (pg. 234) Juan knew that this place was the other men's turf and that he could be in big trouble, but that's the sacrifice and challenge he chose to take on in order to try and alleviate the hardships that his family was going through. We all know what happens after the Filipino comes back from the bathroom, but the point is that Juan was willing to sacrifice his well being or even his life to give it all to his family. That's something that a mother and family can truly appreciate. So... What would people be willing to sacrifice in times of hardship? Depends, how far are you willing to go?

Extra Credit Blog

I found the College Student Inventory to be pretty accurate on how I'm feeling about life and college overall. I think its really neat how we can actually see an estimation of our feelings through this test. The one that surprised me the most was the estimation on how motivated I am in finishing college, it wasn't a high percentage. I know I want to finish college because that's the reason why I'm here in the first place. I don't like to start anything I cant finish, so then why the low percentage? I think to myself and I guess its low because my life and future is very unpredictable right now. In hindsight every body's life is, but mine is all over the place. I do want to finish college but its because my life is so unpredictable that I don't know where my decisions will take me in the future. I hate my life being so unpredictable because I'm a scheduled type of girl and i can't make any long term designs yet because I don't know how it will affect me in the future. Other than that one score, I'm pretty much in agreement with all the other one's. This was a cool activity. Thanks Voltaire.

Blog Response Part II

Question: What qualities, conditions, or circumstances create the need to sacrifice with a family? Many people can agree with me when I say that family almost always comes first. When one of the family members is need family is always that support that helps you even if you deserved what ever happened. Sacrificing for a better tomorrow is what families all over the world do every single day. In the book Rain of Gold, Guadalupe's family is very scared of living in the only place they've known their whole lives; Lluvia de Oro, Mexico. Times are getting rough for the family and now since Don Victor came back into the picture Guadalupe is tired of being the rock of this family. The food is very scarce and the war is getting worse they must do something about this. "One, we wait out the war here in the canyon, hoping that the bandits don't kill us; or two, we go to the United States and wait out the war there." (p.g 171) They're two choices are very common in what we still deal with today. It's so hard to leave the place where you grew up but in this case they must sacrifice in order to stay alive. It's not about what qualities, conditions, or circumstances makes a family sacrifice, but mostly it is the well being of your family no matter what needs to be done. If the family decides to go to the United States, just like Munoz they would be not just leaving their name at the border, but leaving they're hearts at the border.

Question:What is the value of family?
The value of family is recognized and felt differently in everybody. To some people their families mean the world to them, others can't stand them. Some people grow up as orphans and never get to really feel or see what a family is all about. In the book Rain of Gold, Its not easy at all for Lupe to accept her father as her dad. This man that's supposed to be her father comes in to her life all of a sudden to make decisions and change her moms world. he's a stranger. He doesn't belong in the family picture. "No!, you left us! You have no right to tell me what to do!" (p.g 180) Lupe resents her father because he wasn't there to help the family to provide and sustain his family like a man. Now that she's older and doesn't need much of him he decides to be a father. She doesn't feel like she should listen to this man who impregnated her mother a long time ago. As a girl who grew up without my biological father for a while, I completely understand her. I never got to live with my real dad but if he ever wanted to come into my life, honestly, I would feel like its too late. He already lost a lot of special moments in my life. I'm grown, my values and beliefs are already programmed into me. What do I need him for? The value of my family means a lot to me, but only to those who were in my childhood and showed that they were worth it.

Staying Active

Leave your cell phone at the classroo...

Leave your cell phone at the classroom door 

    Adapting to digital culture can have a really positive outlook on some one's life, but it also has its draw backs when people have demands on technology and can't meet the deadlines. My uncle for example always talk about how having a cell phone is a really good and bad thing. He likes having the liberty to text or call his wife and kids to know what they are doing or to ask any questions he might have. On the contrary he hates having a cell phone because that means any one can get a hold of him where ever he is at. If my aunt asks him to call her when he gets off and he doesn't, my aunt might get mad and that's the draw backs. When there's a paper due at a certain time (Voltaire and Susie's class) typing it on the computer is so much easier and faster. On the other side all the networks that we use as students to communicate with our teachers have the time and day. If I don't turn it in at the giving time I will be getting a lower grade for tardiness. Or even if I don't do on the due date, the teacher will always know. Is the digital culture a good or bad thing? You choose.

Reflection on Munoz

Even though I know my name does not carry the heavy accent of a Hispanic or Latino name; whether it is or not I am very proud of my name and wouldn't change it for the world. On the other hand I completely agree with names being the first impression of an employer. The United States is very powerful and diverse, but its still white dominant in most big businesses or "important jobs." I know I wouldn't change my name for the world but If I had to slightly pronounce it another way or conform it to get ahead in life I would do it without a doubt. That's what most people would do, but don't admit to. Being extremely proud of my name and having no job doesn't really leave me with much. Its being able to work intelligently and meet somewhere in the middle. Where I can show I'm proud of my name and heritage but also be at the level I know I should be in and belong to. I would never "try to fit in" I am who I am, but every single person can conform somewhat to get what they want out of life. Someone who is very proud of their name and is aggressive and defensive about it is not playing the game with all the smart hands dealt. You have to learn to meet somewhere in the middle. Your not leaving it at the border, but your also not putting it right on your forehead.

Literature Circle BLOG 1

1. "He sat there, thinking, figuring, looking up at the stars and heavens and then down into the darkness of the valley." (pg.96) Can't you completely imagine that man laying down completely confused on what decision to make? Don Pio was looking for a sign of God to reassure him, he was making the best decision to stay in that "good for nothing" land. As the suns rays come streaming through the sky Don Pio felt Gods presence within himself. He felt the peace of God with a beautiful brand new day. His eyes began to fill with tears because he knew this decision would support his family and generations to come. (pg. 96-97) I chose this scene because I thought it was very spiritual. I could immediately imagine the sun coming up, and it being such a magnificent experience for Don Pio. He was confused and he needed guidance. I also made the personal connection that I think everything happens for a reason, and that everything has a purpose. For Don Pio to see a normal morning and immediately see it as a sign from God because its so lovely is something I would of thought of also. The word I would choose for this scene would be Spiritual, because he's the only person that felt so strong and connected to that experience.
2. "Quick, we've got to get the cart back on the road and pick all the corn we can and get out before Cara de Nopal comes back out with his rifle!" (pg.102) Juan says this in a jokingly manner but he himself knows there's nothing funny about this. While Luisa and Inocenta are trying to pick corn on the prohibited field, they all know the risk they are running. They heard a story about a random little boy that was picking corn and ended up being hung by Cara de Nopal in the gates of the hacienda. His body was still hung as Juan's family were running by, to get away from Cara de Nopal. (p.g 102-103) In contrast with the first example of feeling spiritual; this scene has more to do with reality of the "real world" we live in, rather than based on spiritual connection or faith. I thought this scene was important to talk about because young kids today that grow up in a poor home steal or do stuff that they know will get them killed in order to provide for their families. Its so hard to believe that in our society today, something as simple as trying to feed your family can definitely cost you your life. I would summarize this scene as Truth, because if someone breaks the rules of people you can' play with, that's the end.

What is the Digital Culture?

When I think about digital culture I immediately think about the ipod, mp3's, cell phones, texting etc. We're in a very advanced generation where it's sadly to say has taken over our culture. Personally, I own an ipod Cd's are out of style and having an ipod with multiple songs and different genres of music is so much easier and quicker. I text a lot, more than I do talk on the phone. I know my mom or grandparents will tell me that its so much easier to say what you have to say either in person or over the phone, but texting makes it interesting. Digital culture has facilitated our lives in many ways. We can see t.v in high definition, see our families that live miles and miles away in seconds over the computer. This is a very good thing because in a way one can feel that your somewhat close to your family if they're far away, but in a way we have got "comfortable" with digital culture that the old let me go visit you for the weekend is not as common. It has its pros and cons but then again we always gain and or lose when we have want something.

My Motivation to Attend College

From a young age we are taught that to be successful in the future we must go to college. As a young kid all you want to do is get out of school as soon as possible because A. you wake up too early everyday and B. it's too much homework. As I got older though I realized that I wanted to go to college on my own. I would say my main motivation was my older sister. She decided not to go to college, and I see her life now. Senior year was a very busy year for me, when I wasn't at school I would be in dance practice if I didn't have practice I'd be at work, when I wasn't working I would be doing h.w. My life was very on the go, and the time I would be home I would see my older sister pretty much either watching t.v, eating, waking up late, or just going out with friends. As much as the "lazy life" might seem fun it seemed so blah to me. You have nothing to work towards and that's what I think life is all about. College will prepare me to be the smartest that I allow myself to be. Will make me mature and hopefully make me very successful in the future. I'm full of ambition and I have a passion for life, and College I know will be the boost that I'll need to be the best that I can. I also want to make my mother very proud of me, and be the best role model for my little sister.